Dear Prime Minister Cameron:
It has come to our attention that you recently made a speech during a state dinner in which you claimed that President Obama "has pressed the reset button on the moral authority of the entire free world." Inasmuch as this statement has set a new standard in unctuous, lickspittle toadyism, we have no alternative but to demand that you hand in your Man Card instanter.
In fact, we are far from certain that you are even in possession of an authentic card; it defies belief that anyone capable of engaging in such shameless flattery could ever have come by a Man Card legitimately, and so we suspect that it may well be a forgery. Nonetheless, you are notified herewith that any attempt to pass yourself off as a man, instead of the oleaginous invertebrate humanoid that you have revealed yourself to be, will have the sternest consequences.
Govern yourself accordingly.
President, Man Card International
Cameron thought bubble: "I do hope I don't get mustard on his arse."